Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Dating dilema

Whoa for a second there I was logged off my account and I couldn't remember my email or password. That was scary. So here I am again talking or as I like to refer to it as venting about my dating life. I have been lucky and have gone on some dates recently some good some bad. I dont not like any of them. In fact I think that they are all great guys. Why cant I find the guy who I am excited to see. I remember this being a possibility when I was dating for fun but now that I need that kind of a connection with a guy it just isnt there. I have heard it all. I went with a guy who was nice but is busy with tax season. I get that and I understand. he is at least making an effort which is admirable.Problem is timing isnt right with us right now. Then I go with a guy who things go AWESOME with, but I admit things went fast with. He seemed to like me a lot. I feel like I can say that because well he told me...several times. Then the next thing I know he is talking to me in my car telling me he thinks I am pretty and that he has so much fun with me and that he wants to go on dates but wants to just be friends that in the future something might happen but not now. I feel like I need to add that he used the word friends several times. Then in that same week I have a guy I am crazy about ask me to watch a movie with him at 11 at night. Then he over reacts to me telling him its late and that I find it odd he asked me at 11 at night. He hangs up on me essentially deletes me from his life but oh wait he doesnt forget to send me that nasty mean text to tell me how he really feels. The one I never write back to but save in my phone as a constant reminder to never go back to him. I never once told him mean rude things to hurt him like he did to me. He told me hes crazy about me that he wants to be with me. Last I checked sending a girl a mean text and hanging up on her while talking on the phone isnt how you treat someone you are crazy about. I go on a 3rd date with a guy and hes holding my hand and I am just not feeling it. I think my mom is right that I dont like the nice guys. I think the nice ones bore me. Its not a good thing when you are hoping that they dont kiss you at the door stop. My brother tells me (the one that doesnt like dating) that I need to not lead this guy on and that I should know after the 3rd date. I agree but I dont want to have to tell him what all these guys have told me. How do you tell someone you want to be friends without using the word friends? You dont. I think that is the worst possible time to use that word. I want to carry that buzzer that is in the taboo game and buzz people who use that word when talking to me about our relationship. That makes me sound weird but its true... I think that would make me feel better. An ex of mine starts talking to me here and there and he tells me that none of the girls he lives by are girls he would want to date. He tells me something dumb like I wish you and I lived closer so we could go on fun dates like we used to. I think he said something about the dates being just for fun, I stopped paying attention at that point. Then I get several im messages from an old friend that I have wanted to date forever and kind of did but not really. He tells me how much he misses me that hes thought about me a lot lately . We keep talking and I tell him how we should date and I have always thought that. He says that he agrees. Then out of no where he tells me he has a gf or rather a girl he is dating but not seriously. He tells me that he doesnt like being around this girl. Um  if you have a "gf" then why are you thinking of me ? And why did you let me tell you that I want to date you when you have a "gf." He used the whole excuse that he doesnt want to date me then not be friends. Well youre 31 and I am 25 I would like to believe that NOW is the time to do just that. To date with the chance that it will ruin friendships. I guess what Im most frustrated with is that I find guys I like they excite me and we seem to have a great start. Or I find a guy who is into me more than I am into him. I find a guy who never talks to me or takes me out or the guy who takes me out more than I would like to and talks to me way too much. There is never a balance or a pace that is just right.  This has been my dating lately. I have had some guys tell me that they wanted to date me but never did. Another thing I will never understand.
1. Why didnt you ?
2. Why are you telling me this ?
3. Did you see that as making me feel better that you wanted to date me or worse that you wanted to but never did and Im obviously not worth the effort.

So there you have it my past couple of weeks in a long paragraph full of run on sentences and bad punctuation that I dont plan on fixing. This past little bit of dating is why my talk with my cousin Caity isnt seeming so out there and the idea of swearing off dating seems more and more like a great idea.

2 comments:

  1. That sounds so frustrating! I hope things start to get better for you! And I know they will! You are a really cute and fun girl :)

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  2. Thanks Liz I had to write about it and clear my mind of it. Things have gotten better !

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